Jan. 5

I know I am a little behind on blogging but come on who is really reading and keeping up with me. But here it goes Jan. 5 Wed. after my surgery I got to go home. My daughter La Sha came up to stay with me and a what I call a special friend came by just to visit before I went home (Jack). Now come on if someone knew you were going home that day how many friends would make the effort to come up there. They would probley wait until you got home. But not Jack he came up there and stay until I felt the hospital and walk out with me.

Got home around 1:30p and my x and his girl friend came by to visit me and brought me so flowers it was a nice visit. Then Mandi and the kids Kaydence and Hunter came by also to visit me. It was nice to see them. Didn't do to much but setting around and visit with company. Later that night La Sha empty 4 of my drains that was a experience since it was all new to me and to her. But she was awesome and was being be careful not to hurt me. La Sha has taken such good care of me. But she is a little upset cause I want take pain pills. But don't really need them to much.

By the end of the week was trying to do things for myself. Trying to take the load off of her which she was not to happy about. My scars are ugly and big and long. But hey its ok they will fade as time goes on and who is looking at my chest any way NO ONE! I can deal with it, its not pretty but it is something that had to be done. There was times when I would look at myself and ask why did I do this to myself. Then I have to stop and think this was not my choice, I didn't make his decision. It is something that needed to be done and then I look in the mirror and I am ok with it. You know how the mind works it makes you think silly things and then you have to re-check you thoughts and get back on the right page.