Been Thinking!

Been thinking here lately not sure way maybe cause surgery is coming up pretty soon. Here are my thoughts. When you have some thing like cancer people go into hiding or they come out of the closet. So they keep in touch with you at the beginning and then they stop talking to you. I have had some friends that when they found out its all about keeping in touch asking and show their concerns and that they are prayer for you. And then you don't hear from them any more why is that? What are they afraid of? That they might get it or is it because I lost my hair or because I won't have a chest any more. And then there are the ones that don't talk to you in such a long time. And when they found out they are always checking on you, are they making up for lost time? I don't understand cause my cancer, my hair lost, and having one breast remove does not change me as a person. I wonder after I have my breast remove how many others won't have any thing to do with me. Its OK if no one wants any thing to do with me I'm find with it. But don't judge me by my cover you didn't before or did you! This has been on my mind alot here lately. Does it hurt me, no, it just disappoints me in how the ones that was close to you are not any more. So who are your real friends and who is your real family?